All these tales, told in that drowsy undertone with which men talk in the dark, the countenances of the listeners only now and then receiving a casual gleam from the glare of a pipe, sank deep in the mind of Ichabod. He repaid them in kind with large extracts from his invaluable author, Cotton Mather, and added many marvellous events that had taken place in his native State of Connecticut, and fearful sights which he had seen in his nightly walks about Sleepy Hollow.
— Washington Irving, “The Legend of Sleepy Hollow“
Maybe one way to approach The Hollow (2004), directed by Kyle Newman, is to pretend someone is retelling Irving’s 1820 tale on Halloween night. However, that storyteller feels compelled to update it for an early 21st-century, Young Adult audience. Of course, certain changes would be needed:
- Step One: to hold the demographic’s interest, set the story around 2004, swapping the book-smart/street-stupid Ichabod Crane with his high-school-aged descendent Ian Cranston. Crane and Cranston are both newcomers to Sleepy Hollow, but Cranston did not inherit Crane’s belief in stories of the supernatural.
- Step Two: introduce tension between well-rounded Ian and his sports-nut father because high schoolers often identify with parental conflicts.
- Step Three: borrow the type of one-dimensional, borderline-manic bully found in, say, Revenge of the Nerds (1984) and give him no name beyond Brody because that’s vaguely like Abraham “Brom Bones” van Brunt.
- Step Four: don’t bother to explain why Karen, the Katrina Van Tassel variant, seems to be dating Brody as the story opens. Also, right up front, make it painfully clear that Karen will wind up with Ian. Washington Irving schmwashington schmirving!
- Step Five: get rid of any uncertainty about the Horseman; make the head-hungry demon completely real. Ambiguity schmambiguity!
Not a Beloved Retelling, But…
There are some who love the Disney version. There are some who love the Tim Burton version. There are a few of us who love the Pierre Gang version. The Hollow, however, has not received a lot of love—and yet critics do seem to glimpse some merits in it. Michael DeFellipo, of Horror Society, says, “I was severely underwhelmed,” though he stipulates the movie might be enjoyed by younger teens. This view is shared by Andrew Smith at Popcorn Pictures, who says it “doesn’t do any justice to Washington Irving’s classic story whatsoever.” Sarah E. Jahier, of the The Spooky Vegan, explains that “the few subplots don’t really work” while “the pacing is a bit slow and the Headless Horseman doesn’t make an appearance until half-way through the flick.” Despite a couple more negatives, such as a predictable plot, she maintains “nonetheless I enjoyed it.”
With similar reservations, I can recommend the movie for a bit of mindless Halloween fun. That predictable plot means you probably won’t have to hit pause while handing out candy to trick-or-treaters. And you’ll see some familiar faces. To his credit, Stacy Keach seemed in sync with the let’s-just-have-goofy-fun mood of the thing. He plays the Sleepy Hollow Cemetery caretaker who has researched the legend and, for reasons never shared, knows that the reappearance of a Crane descendent will resurrect the horrible Horseman. I liked that this conventional “Keep off the moors!” figure is given a good chunk of screen time. Judge Reinhold, on the other hand, doesn’t quite immerse himself into the vapidly written role of the disapproving dad. Seeing a pre-Big Bang Theory Kaley Cuoco as Karen was fun, but her cheerleader character would not be cheered as a positive female role model for the new century. Kevin Zegers as Ian gave me strong Zac Efron vibes, and I got distracted by the prospect of seeing if his dimples could support teeny-tiny jack-o’-lanterns. Yeah, that’s probably just me. But now I’ve planted the picture in your head.
Regarding Brom Bones—uhm—Brody
Now, I’m a bit too old to have recognized Nick Carter, who plays Brody, as a member of the Backstreet Boys. Jahier, the reviewer mentioned above, says, “His ‘white boy trying to do gangsta’ persona is just annoying and embarrassing.” She wished the character had died early, which certainly would have been a daring twist on Irving’s original. That is, if we see Brody as a kind of bad-boy, boy-band Brom Bones. Personally, I blame the character’s cringy quality on the scriptwriter more than the actor. Brody is written to be bland, if not boring, in that he has no backstory, no inner conflicts or contradictions or complexities, and no real motives other than to exist as a foil for Ian. And that’s not Brom Bones.
In fact, Brody’s role as jerk/jock is another illustration of what I’ve come to call the “bully-ization of Brom Bones,” a trend that can be traced back to the 1922 film version, The Headless Horseman. Yes, Irving’s Brom Bones is rollicking and robust, but he’s not cruel or conniving. Okay, maybe he’s a bit conniving, if indeed he preys on Crane’s “odd mixture of small shrewdness and simple credulity,” as Irving words it, to scare that newcomer out of town. Brody simply isn’t crafty enough to present any real challenge to Ian. And that’s not Brom Bones, either.
Curiously, filmmakers who turn Brom into a bully don’t just fail to capture the spirit of this character. They also ruin the rivalry between him and Ichabod.
